I have been in London now for 225 days and what a blast I've been having. Sadly it's not all fun and games but there is humour in the wrongness of some things.
I think the saddest part of being an Aussie (or anyone really) on a visa is the lonely factor. I have great friends... I've connected with some people in a way that I never thought I could over here. Chris is a fine example. One of the hottest guys I have ever met happens to be one of my best mates, someone I would now take a bullet for. He was so nice to me when I first met him (one of the first guys I met when I moved here) and he even took me out to Gordon Ramsay's restaurant, Maze, for my birthday. Let it be known on record that he is someone I fucking love to death.
Sadly not all my experiences have been like that. I was talking about being lonely right? I mean, I've never been one for random hookups. Over here I have had a few. There are a number of hot guys. But could I just hook up with random guys for two years? HELL NO. That's just not me at all and I've gotten to the point where I'm over it. I want to fall asleep next to someone, my arm around them, waking up to see them and knowing that life is pretty sweet instead of that awkward feeling in the morning when one person kind of wants to get out of there (usually me).
I came across a person on Grindr today. He was 180kg (he looked it but was it really his picture?) and had a partner and was just looking for fun. I don't want to sound too defeatist but if a 180kg guy can be happily partnered then what am I doing wrong? SERIOUSLY.
Here's a short list of people I have met, where things haven't gone quite so right:
- Soon after getting here I met a lovely guy. I don't believe in love at first sight but I fell for him very quickly, as he seemed to fall for me too. Just your average boy next door, he was super cute and super nice. Sadly he was depressed and harboured a dark secret from his past that means we only send a text to each other every couple of months.
- I met someone else who was a terrible kisser and super religious. I only had a problem with the bad kissing bit but I think some of my "I dislike street preachers" comments put him offside. He only told me how religious he was after I had made such statements.
- I really liked another guy and he really liked me. I'm not an idiot, I know the signs. Sadly he admitted he had started to really like me and I should have just been a one night stand - he has a boyfriend of seven years.
- I hooked up with a guy who failed to tell me he was narcoleptic, so suddenly, half way through he just falls over and starts snoring. A deep sleep, unable to be woken up. After checking he was breathing and getting dressed I went home and then worried that if he died I could be in trouble. A call to the ambulance subsequently lead to them heading over and checking him out, and him later confessing he has a "minor sleep problem".
- I do like another guy, but for one reason or another some texts and voicemails don't get through to him. This guy is a really sweet man and as MUCH as I want something to happen between us, I can't get my hopes up. On the off chance this guy sees this, his name starts with S and rhymes with 'Horn'.
Some people will argue I am looking too hard. I'm actually not. But I also don't think it's wrong to really want something as opposed to just casual sex.
Until next time,
(I'll be the one that keeps your heart in the clouds)